Pre & Post wedding parties


If you're planning a destination wedding then it's only realistic to expect that not everyone you want to invite will be able to attend. After all, you're asking guests to take time off work to spend what is almost a mini holiday with you and your groom. Apart from availability, the cost is far going to exceed that of a wedding gift.

Holding a pre wedding party for family and close friends who you would like to be at your wedding, gives you the chance of breaking the news to them of your decision to wed overseas. It also gives them an opportunity of asking a few questions and understanding the reasons for your choice. It's a time to make it clear that you won't feel any the less for them if they are unable to attend and to let them know that you are planning to hold a reception party for everyone on your return.

When it comes to the reception party, etiquette dictates that you shouldn't really host the party yourself, since you're asking people who perhaps weren't invited in the first place to attend your wedding, to come and give you their best wishes. In this instance it's going to look much more favourable on you both as a couple if the invitation comes from your parents.

Pre & Post wedding parties

The party is still to celebrate your marriage but without all the drama of the exchanging of vows, bouquet tossing and the cake cutting. Some people are possibly going to be a little miffed that they weren't asked to your wedding in the first instance and may think, well why should I attend this party. Although no-one is likely to ask you outright it might be a good idea to have a statement that you can announce once everyone has arrived. You could say something to the effect that both your jobs keep you so busy that you didn't have time to plan a big wedding but that the party is just a thank you for everyone being so supportive. With this statement, you've given everyone the impression that:

  • hardly anyone was invited
  • there's a good reason why no invitations were sent out – you just didn't have time
  • you're thanking people for their support before they've had a chance to show it, which will have the effect of making them want to be.

Once you've got this statement out of the way, your parents can propose a toast, the music can be cranked up a notch, and everyone can have a blast. I almost forgot to say, you get to show off your dress and feel like a princess one more time.

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